Happy Birthday Cousin Alexis Kiev Lowther...at least, I'm pretty sure today is your birthday. When he's older, Johnny will sing November Spawned a Monster to you. After all, your coolest uncle, Uncle Eddie Sir, says that is your theme song. If the Minister of Cool says it, then it must be true. Fret not, it's a Morrissey song. It's rufus to have a Morrissey or The Smiths theme song.
Why, it was only a 15-years ago that your brother, Dillon, traded you to Uncle Eddie Sir for a bag of spicy peanuts. Your mother and father have done a nice job in rearing you properly.
We'll get new photos of the two of you together later this evening. He won't be Johnny mittens and he'll be freshly bathed. We do like to make a good impression.
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